The Alpaca.
The Alpaca is indeed a strange and mildly fierce creature, which, to the
untrained eye appears as merely a sheep with a longer than normal neck, while in
truth, have so much more to offer. These mystical creatures not only have the
power to organize themselves in various geometrical shapes and patterns, but can
also provide a three-course meal in less than twenty six minutes.
The Alpaca originated in Brazil, where, feeding on the many poor natives (the
ones, who were neither buck-toothed, nor exceptional at football), this majestic beast
became the dominant species, overcoming even humans. The alpaca’s economy really
started going when George (the alpaca with the neck that was slightly longer than
the rest and I believe he also had one eye that was a different colour than the
other) started up Alpaca Motors Ltd., the premier car manufacturers in all
of South America. This was only the first step in the rise to dominance of the alpaca nation.
In 1953, the Brazilians commenced a brief rebellion against the Alpaca regime,
now headed by fascist leader, General Rory. However, the Brazilians artillery was
on such a level lower than that of the Alpacas’ that what had started as typical guerrilla
warfare became a range war, and the Brazilians were quickly decimated.
An alpaca’s strengths include knitting, singing gently, and Internet poker, in
fact the national champion, Jorge, is one of the most famous Internet poker players
of all time, under the user name: longlivegeneralrory62.
Anyway, thanks for your time, this has been the first edition of Griffin’s Animal Corner,
hope you enjoyed.
Until next week, good luck, and avoid war against alpaca’s at all costs.
Paul Griffin.
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