Paul Griffin’s Animal Corner #5 – The Tarsier: “Mommy, what’s wrong with that man’s face?”

Merci mes amis, et bienvenue à Paul Griffin’s coin d’animaux. Aujourd’hui, nous avons un nouveau… Oh excuse the French! Anyways, on with today’s mildly offensive view at nature’s freaks. Today we have the Tarsier, which is of course a magnificent beast, which originated in Bristol around the 1970s.

Little is known about the Tarsier, and indeed it wasn’t actually discovered until 1997, as a participant on then-daily TV show “Blockbusters”. The particular Tarsier on the show claimed that he would like to become a DJ and perhaps even a writer. High hopes for the new species. It was later discovered that Tarsiers had been around for up to 20 years before the show, and had only emerged when the opportunity to appear on TV showed up.
After the Blockbusters appearance, the Tarsiers went missing again. They were not heard of again until in 1999, on “Poxy radio station” Xfm London, the low Bristol drone of the Tarsiers once again rocked the airwaves. It seemed that the Tarsier that had previously claimed fame on then-daily TV show Blockbusters, was now hosting a week-end Radio show alongside rotund funnyman, Ricky Gervais. This continued until the station was bought by rival station Capital FM.
During the hiatus, the Tarsier, who had by now become Gervais’ close friend and writing partner, wrote what was to become one of Britain’s best loved sitcoms, “the office”. This ran for 2 seasons, and also 2 bonus Christmas episodes were recorded. While Gervais took the limelight as rotund funnyman boss, David Brent, the Tarsier was content to sit back and concentrate on the writing duties, although he did make a cameo appearance as “Oggy”.



After writing “the office” the Tarsier returned to Xfm, once again alongside rotund funnyman, Ricky Gervais and “Baldy Headed Manc Twat with a Head like a F*cking Orange” Karl Pilkington. This incantation of the Xfm show ran for 4 seasons, finally ending in 2005. After which, the Tarsier both co-wrote and took on a major, award-winning turn as incompetent agent Darren Lamb, in follow-up sitcom, “Extras”.
After the success of the Xfm show, the Tarsier once again reunited with rotund funnyman, Ricky Gervais and “Round Headed Little Bod” Karl Pilkington for a series of podcasts. These underwent unforeseen success, even breaking into the Guinness Book of World Records for most downloaded Podcast ever.
Unfortunately, the Tarsier does undergo some criticism, normally for looking like a “Goggle Eyed Freak”, “Lanky Co-Writer”, and “Weird Piece of Art”, but it is still written in the stars as to what lies in store for the cheeky 6 foot 7 inch creature. Good Luck Tarsier, I say. Good Luck.
Anyway I know this week’s was a bit of a shambles but next week’s will be better I swear, y’know, tests an’ that, your pal, Paul Griffin.